BREAKING NEWS UPDATE: HO-SHEET, a DD! I'm absolutely grateful for
all the wonderful comments and +favs and whatnot,
but this is probably the most ironic piece that could
be featured from me. Ah well. It's kind of awesome
If you're curious what my teacher thought, she said
that she knew she shouldn't call it good, but that she
wanted to, and that good critique is hard to give as well
as take. There's a very fine line between what's good and what's bad, and then a finer one in how to express that. Her example was a poem by Lawrence Ferlinghetti that compared writing a poem to walking a tightrope. Anyway, she then said that maybe I could take out the line about "I just said 'fuck in a poem I have written for school,' because it was somewhat redundant. Other than that, she said she really couldn't think of anything, and gave me an A.
Also, big shout-outs to , my wondrous girlfriend, and , an amazing writer, poet, and friend I've always admired. Go check out their work. It's definitely worth your while.
And, of course, big thanks to BloodyFreakingMary and fllnthblnk for the suggesting and featuring and whatnot. I'm incredibly grateful, guys.
Here, have some cookies:
This is another poem I wrote for my AP English 12 class. The assignment was that we had to write a "tell 'em off" poem, where we--obviously--tell somebody off. Unfortunately, I'm not really the angry sort. I really don't know how to tell somebody off, because if they bother me, they're not worth the effort and I'll just leave. I really don't think anyone's ever seen me pissed. Mad, maybe, but outright pissed? Never. Then I had to think of who to tell off, and no one came to mind. I could probably tell off the girl I liked, but I didn't really want to. I really can't be pissed at her, and every time I tried to write a poem going in that direction, it just made me sad inside. I'd feel miserable and flop down on my bed and refuse to move--Caleb the social starfish, I guess. That image makes me smile. Plus, I'm kinda sick about having poems referring to her in one way or another, or any of my artwork at all. I know that it'll probably happen anyway, and it does, but I'm seriously not doing it on purpose, and I try not to encourage it.
That said, I decided to write about how my teacher always comments with "nice" or "good image" on my paper. I know she's busy, but even one line of critique would be nice. So I decided to write a poem about that. The first poem was actually called "fuck censorship" and was fairly graphic for a school assignment, and I was going to turn that in. But I wasn't happy with it, so I didn't. I wrote this instead, and it's the epitome of "don't try." I really did write all of it in my fifth-period economy class, recorded it onto a CD ten minutes before school started, and typed the poem in my third-period art class (I have English 4th period.) Then I asked the teacher for a paper clip and clipped the CD to the paper and turned it in. I said that it was spoken word, because I thought it would be more interesting. Then I told her not to listen to it during my class period, and to wear headphones when she did. Also, in the copy I turned in, right after the "let's flush this fucker down" line, there was an ellipses followed by "I just said 'fuck' in a poem I am turning in for school." She told me that line was stating the obvious, though, so I took it out for this copy.
Oh, and the "dominatrix" line is from an inside-joke between
and I, because our teacher always decides to wear leather boots. XD
Also, the "beer-shit guttural splattering" line is based off of a quote I like by Charles Bukowski. He said that a good poem was like taking a beer-shit. It all comes out fluid, all at once. You watch it, kind of proudly, and bask in its fumes, and then you feel a little sad as you flush it away. So that's where that line came from.
All in all, I'm amused by this, and I hope everyone else is, too. Enjoy.